“Genki” – a word used to describe a state of happiness & cheerfulness. It’s what you express always in the face of boredom, tiredness, loneliness, or whatever real feeling you may have.
This experience, thus far, is something I’ve never felt before in my time on Earth. It’s a mixed feeling of fear & opportunity. A feeling of belonging and a feeling of astrangement. It’s the best of what I like about Japan and what I fear most of all.
Lingering over me is this sense that I need to try my best not to screw this up. To get better at communicating; to get stronger in my Japanese ability. To work towards hegemony between my Western American roots and Japan’s hard and fast cultural identity.
No matter how impossible this sounds, this is going to be my challenge. It probably will also change me drastically in the process.
~J
